That is a tough question and it depends on who you ask. Here is a definition I like from the American Psychological Association (APA). They have a great article about the therapeutic process HERE. The article in that link also discusses when to consider therapy and a brief explanation of different types of therapy.

The APA definition states:

“Psychotherapy is a collaborative treatment based on the relationship between an individual and a psychologist. Grounded in dialogue, it provides a supportive environment that allows you to talk openly with someone who’s objective, neutral and nonjudgmental. You and your psychologist will work together to identify and change the thought and behavior patterns that are keeping you from feeling your best.”

The folks over at Good Therapy wrote a great general definition as well as some excellent follow up questions. Their article is HERE I’m pasting the text here for your convenience but feel free to check out their page to read more.

“Therapy, also called psychotherapy or counseling, is the process of meeting with a therapist to resolve problematic behaviors, beliefs, feelings, relationship issues, and/or somatic responses (sensations in the body). Beginning therapy can be a big step toward being the healthiest version of yourself and living the best life possible—no matter what challenges you may be facing. Through therapy, you can change self-destructive behaviors and habits, resolve painful feelings, improve your relationships, and more.”

The therapeutic process--how you share your feelings and experiences--is considered to be just as important as the specific issues or concerns you share in therapy. Once you start therapy, it may help to know and recognize elements of healthy therapy as well as warning signs of questionable therapy.

On the whole, you can expect that your therapist will be someone who supports you, listens attentively, models a healthy and positive relationship experience, gives you appropriate feedback, and follows ethical guidelines. Good therapy should be tailored to you and your experiences.”

I think these folks nailed it, but I also want to add a few additional elements. The “patterns that are keeping you from your best” they mention do not have to be life threatening or even highly disrupting. Even people who are “doing well” can benefit from therapy. As I talk about in a lot of my other blogs, often, small shifts in important areas like values LINK or boundaries can create ripples in our lives. Others may not notice them, but you will feel them. Sometimes a bit of therapy is the difference between just getting by and fully living.. Therapy empowers people through helping them understand who they are (not who they were told to be), how they got here, and can even help people figure out where they’re going.

The therapeutic relationship is a super cool place where you get to be super honest, you don’t have to worry about hurting the therapist’s feelings, and your therapist uses all their knowledge of humans and change to help you see new sides of your situation so you can make an informed choice moving forward. It’s a one-sided relationship in that it’s (almost) all about you, but you and your therapist are working very closely together toward your goals.

I like to tell my clients, they are the captain and I am the first mate. They own the map & steer the ship, but because I’m not steering, I can be a great navigator and point out things they might not have noticed, but they make the call to change directions or not. Over time, my clients become really great captains who know their seas and how to weather storms and they may not need me to help navigate anymore. When that happens, we share a firm handshake and off they go, wind in their sails. When we say goodbye, I always let my folks know - if they sail into uncharted territory they are always welcome to call on me again.

If you think you could use a first mate in these high seas, I encourage you to learn more about me here. I am happy to answer any questions you may have before making an appointment. To book your free 20 minute consultation, fill out the form on my Get Started page.

If you want to take a navigation course on your own time, you can check out my online self-study course. Deepening & Developing Connections. It goes through how to find your values, set your priorities, discover your vulnerabilities, and evaluate your boundaries. It also guides you in how to connect with others deeply and genuinely by showing your true self and asking them about their true self. I also spend a whole lesson on conflict and how to use it to build your relationships rather than tearing them down. The Deepening & Developing Connections Workshop is available any time at ddcworkshop.thinkific.com

Dr. Fae

has a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology. She lives abroad and offers online therapy & clinical supervision. In her individual therapy practice, she specializes in value alignment, existential questions, decision making, and general coping to increase overall life satisfaction. Her online self-study course Deepening & Developing Connections is always available.
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*The content on online-therapy.net is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical/therapy advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical/mental condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website.

What is Therapy?